One Direction

http://www.spinsouthwest.com/wp-content/files//2012/03/oned-beatles-460x269.jpg
Honestly, c'mon guys.
Doesn't it seem a teensy bit POMPOUS to literally take the exact same picture that the Beatles took?
Seriously, none of their publicists thought it a little premature to take this photo? Especially considering the fact that these guys only have about 5 years, tops, before they lose their fame?
My god, it just makes me so angry to see them there. I feel like in the last Harry Potter when he's all like "How dare you stand where he stood." Wow, I have nothing more that is funny to say about this. Just that Simon Cowell is a megalomaniac to the max. And this is coming from the guy who calls his website "The Best Funny Music Blog Ever."

New Music Vocab #1

I thought it might be fun to try my hand at coining new words,
perhaps by gently shoving them into popular culture,
perhaps by aggressively forcing them into your current vernacular, ensuring that you use them when talking to your friends. Either way, I'd like to try some out, see how it goes.

Victory Lap (Vic-tor-EE Lap) n.
A. A word used to describe a song that builds off of previous success,
often by using the same formula.
The Plain White T's "Rhythm of Love" was a total Victory Lap of "1, 2, 3, 4"


Metalomaniac (Me-tal-o-main-ee-ak) n.
A. A neurotic metalhead who thinks he looks cool even though his songs sound like crap, often be seen in self-indulgent YouTube videos, often with fan to blow hair back and link to his album on Spotify. He thinks he's a music prodigy, especially when he shows you his own invented scales like the "Sesquipaloadacrapolian" mode.
Anyone who listens to the band "Dragonforce" is automatically a Metalomaniac.


Ozzy (Ah-zee) v.
A. To stay afloat despite having numerous setbacks, often shattering everyone's low expectations by continuing to stay alive even though you obviously shouldn't be (unless divine intervention is involved).
I totally Ozzied on that last test. I have no idea how I got an A, I didn't study at all.
B. To bite the head of a bat off.
I totally Ozzied in that bat cage. Yum!

Cheat Sheet #3: Stevie Ray Vaughan

Band: Stevie Ray Vaughan and Double Trouble
Main Members: Stevie Ray Vaughan, Chris Layton, Tommy Shannon
Top Tracks: Crossfire, Couldn't Stand the Weather, Cold Shot, Pride and Joy, Texas Flood
How To Talk to a Fan: Make sure to mention how tragic it was how he died in a helicopter crash, Mention him as one of your favorite guitarists, how you love his guitar, and how he was ranked 7th on Rolling Stone's 100 Greatest Guitarists of All Time. MAKE SURE TO ACT INCREDIBLY ANGRY HOW HE ISN'T IN THE ROCK AND ROLL HALL OF FAME YET! Remember, nothing unites fans like being annoyed at how underrated their favorite artist is.
Further Sources:
Wikipedia- Stevie Ray Vaughan
Stevie's Website

And now... yet another segment

I call it "Overanalyzing Pop Songs."
It will attempt to bring the incredibly complicated and thoughtful ideas expressed in present pop music. It will share with you every Tolstoy reference, every hint of symbolism, and even the hardest to decode allusions to modern events and politics.
PSHAW! OF COURSE NOT! I'M JUST GOING TO MAKE SNIDE REMARKS AND ACT ALL ANNOYING AND POMPOUS LIKE I CAN DO BETTER! So if you want to read about that, feel free to tune in, and I can guarantee it will be more fun for me than you.